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What recharges you?

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How quickly things can change. The first three pictures and the second three pictures are 12 hours apart. Montana is often capable of all four seasons in a day. That’s some of the magic and mystique of it.  Once the snow started in earnest, the two ladies in the last pictures came by the cabin. I think they knew how they could and would help calm my soul. The peace of the snow falling, the crackling of the fire in the stove, the rushing of the creek in the distance, and the majesty of the two elk walking through.  What do you do for self care and recharging? Do you see the value in it? Earlier that day, I participated in a suicide awareness walk. As I stood in the gathering area, I was struck by how varied the people were that had been impacted. Some lost siblings, children, parents, friends, co-workers. As individual as fingerprints, so are the impacts and ripples from suicide.  As an educator, I’ve been impacted by students choosing suicide. I’ve seen the brutal impact ...
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“I quote the Stones….”

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​My kids hated when I would say, “I quote the Stones…” because it was usually followed with, “You can’t always get what you want..”  I had a Stones moment this past week. Had something I wanted not go as I had hoped. But, after 59+ years, I’m much better at seeing AND accepting that it happened as it should.  “But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need….” Not getting something I wanted this week helped further ignite plans and goal for the future and helped me realize I needed to reallocate some time and energy. All good things. And it is a Top Knot weekend. The weather is top shelf. Getting stairs on the deck. Putting the solar panels on racks for greater efficacy and ease of upgrade in the future. And a pop up reminder of what it looked like 2 years ago today. Life is good.  No…life is GREAT! I’m a lucky boy.  “We decided that we would have a soda….my favorite flavor….cherry red….”
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Hello May!

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Gift weekend at Top Knot. Feeling my age a little this weekend. Still get to do all I want…just has a slower pace and a lot more science in it. Poured footers to hold the kids that will be the stair stringers for the steps up to the deck  did a little plumbing work. Tinkers with the solar. This place will never be “done”, but I also had down time. Napped in the sun. Fed the birds and chipmunks.  Amazing how important time away becomes. Clears the mind. Recharges the batteries. Helps provide clarity of purpose and planning. What may the future hold? Ideas are percolating and developing. Stay tuned!  But, life at Top Knot will be about letting the pace be set naturally, not dictated. Less is truly more. ​
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The past shapes our future

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I was fortunate last week and got to take a trip back to where I grew up in New Jersey. The house in Flemington is where I lived from birth to 10 years old. The current owner was extremely kind and, after I described the layout of the interior in great detail, offered to let me walk through. As is the case with all things, it seemed so much smaller than I remembered.  I was flooded with memories. Christmas mornings on the stairs. We had to let our dad take a pic before we go to the presents. Riding sleds in the yard. Trick or treating in the neighborhood. Riding the wheels off 3 Big Wheels.  But also the violence. My next up older brother was incredibly abusive to me there. Broke my neck. Regular punching and beating. Held me bareback in a hornets nest. Put cigarettes out on me. Literally attempted to kill me 5-10 times living there. Also visited the second neighborhood I lived in. 5th-7th grade. A lot more positive memories there. That brother left home after the first year o...
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So much gratitude

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​ Weekend started off strong….double Shirley Temple. It had been a lot of peopling during the week. Then, as is the case at Top Knot, Mother Nature did her thing. Stars out last night. 50 degrees, blue skies, no humidity, calm winds today. It’s overwhelmingly peaceful and battery charging to be up here. Readies me for the upcoming week.  Dropped a few trees. Did some work on the porch. Tweaked the solar system a little. Cooked some yummy burgers for dinner. Chatted up the chipmunks while they feasted on the peanuts and Cheerios I “spilled”. Listened to the creek running strong in the distance.  Now the sun has set and the stars are out again. Temp is falling and it will be good sleeping tonight.  The consulting company website has been redesigned and will launch soon. This next week, I am traveling to New Jersey and NYC and will visit some places that hold lots of memories. Some wonderful and some that take me back to dark times. Times I thought I wasn’t going to survive....
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